Stephanie’s Standards

"Oh but he's such a catch," she said, when her friends raised their eyebrows at one another. "He's got some limbs and a mouth and a functioning brain. He speaks fluent English and has read at least three books for pleasure. He can boil water and operate a car. I'm quite certain he's never murdered anyone, and he doesn't kick my dog."

Thus enlightened, her friends had no choice but to be happy for her. Except for Stephanie, who secretly wondered what sort of fish had been thrown back.